Cabin Crew

Everyone’s all like, ‘Isn’t flying awful? Budget airlines. No leg room. Have to pay for seat reservations. Blah blah blah.’

And I’m pretty worried when I get on the plane. You see Dad’s in 33D and Mum’s in 33E and there’s an old woman who looks a bit like Grandma in 33F, and I’m looking around like,

‘Where’s my seat then?’

And it turns out I’ve just got this little belt and I’m supposed to sit nicely on Mum’s knee the whole way.

Well I don’t really fancy that so I’m kicking and shouting and flapping my arms around, banging into Mum and Dad and the old lady and grabbing those plastic cards with all the pictures on and trying my best to break the little fold down table.

And then one of the nice ladies in the uniform spots me and I flash her my absolute best smile and just like that my luck changes…

Newborn

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